What 10 miles means to me

I finally made my way back to double digits today.
Bittersweet.
I compared my last 10 miler with today's and realized I have some work to do to get back to where I was.

Today.....

August 2014.....

Lots of thoughts.

Go slow. No slower.

The words blew in from a familiar faraway place. I recognized them immediately and slowed my pace. My breathing fell into a natural easy rhythm and my body settled immediately in. I used that as my mantra every time I caught myself pushing too hard and too fast.

The best part of the run was hitting a place I havent been to in a very long time. There's this place where I feel completely connected to something so much bigger than myself.

It's every single moment I've ever run from and every single dream I'm running toward, all in one.

It's the feeling of powerlessness having all 98 pounds of my mom in my arms when she finally realized she was dying.
It's the birth of my daughters.
It's the little girl I bring with me every run, the one wanting someone to save her, sitting with her suitcase waiting for that someone who never came.
It's too many years of fear. Too many years of unhappiness.
Too many years of saying yes.
It's the moment I took my power back.
It's the moment I crossed the marathon finish line.
It's passion, love and exhilaration.
It's tears, heartbreak and sadness.
It's the pleasure.
It's the pain.
And it;s right there.
And somehow I make it through it all to the other side.
And i finish stronger.
Every time.

That's what 10 miles means to me.